zach n kali

It's been six months since my mom met Jesus face to face. Over these six months I have cried, agonized, and missed her so desperately I have felt as though my heart and guts were being ripped from my body. I have asked "Why?" over and over again. I have felt cheated, angered, and jealous of those who have been given more than sixty years with their own mothers. I have had panic attacks over our decision to let her go, even though I know that it was the right choice. I have questioned almost everything - except one thing. I have never questioned God's love. God loved my mom. Looking at her life, it might not seem like it. How could a good and loving God allow her body to absolutely fail her? How could a loving God allow someone as energetic and vibrant and Kingdom-focused reduce her to a shell of who she was? How selfish could he be to allow himself to be given glory through her suffering? Throughout her life, I questioned a lot; but I never questioned his love - becau

Four and a half years ago, three novice cyclists decided to take on 90 miles of wine country to raise money for the National MS Society. We trained, fund-raised, and made the long drive up to Sonoma, where we quickly realized we had no idea what we were up against. My adorable teal Townie was no match for the hills and one of us may have ridden most of the day in a high gear. We showered in trucks, slept in a tent, woke up sore and exhausted, but also incredibly proud of what our tiny little team did. We might not have raised the funds that Team Google did or ridden the 150 mile route that the seasoned cyclists did, but together we rode in honor of an amazing women with the hope that the funds we raised could somehow be used for her in her fight against MS.  Four and a half years later, we are standing together again. Once again in honor of Carol Klingsmith, who two months ago passed away from pneumonia complicated by her MS, and this time with the hope that any funds we raise will

It's International Women's Day today.  And I would give anything to have the most important woman in my life back.  It's also exactly two months since she left us, but the pain is as real and visceral as it was that day.  My mom was not and will never be famous.  She didn't change the world, open new doors, knock down walls.  She was the definition of quiet stability.  She was the embodiment of strength.  In 1991, with three young children and a traveling husband, and living on the mission field, she was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis.  And she prayed, not only for her own healing, but more than that that she would first and foremost bring glory to God, and secondly, that she would be there for her kids.  This incredible woman had devoted herself to her God, her husband, and her children, knowing that her purpose was not to make a name for herself, but to live and breathe Jesus regardless of her circumstances.  She created a warm and safe and godly environment growin

On January 8th, Jesus welcomed my mother saying, "Well done, my good and faithful servant". On January 19th we celebrated her life with friends and family. I thought long and hard over what I would share during her service.  Words could never do this incredible woman justice. I thought about the suffering she endured here on earth. So much suffering. There is no question about the MS that took a toll on her body, especially over the last 14 years. But no one has really addressed the suffering that my mom dealt with from 1998-2008 as she raised three preteens and teenagers. People have talked about the joy she had as she chose Jesus instead of bitterness, but what about the joy she chose to find in sitting through 27 middle school and high school plays – not just once, but every single performance? She deserves a plaque at Vienna Christian School. We talk about Mom's perseverance through her pain, but what about the ways that she persevered through conversation as I reco